Miley Cyrus’ Achy Breaky Makeover

News stories about tween phenom Miley Cyrus are becoming more and more disturbing.

Millions of young girls follow the star’s every move and imitate her to a T.

Parents are growing weary at having to field questions over Miley-related news stories that are slowly morphing Hannah Montana’s alter ego into a broken Britney clone.

Girls of primary school age, still clutching teddy bears, are having to reconcile their idealized image of the Disney star with that of a semi-nude picture on MySpace and suggestive photos in Vanity Fair.

Either Miley herself, or perhaps her handlers, think that giving the teen idol a bad girl makeover may serve to broaden the scope of her career.

Maybe it’s time for Miley’s conservative leaning dad, Billy Ray, to be a little more proactive in the protection department.

Parents the world over would appreciate it.

James Hirsen is a media analyst, Trinity Law School professor, and teacher of mass media and entertainment law at Biola University.

Robert Redford: Obama ‘Not Tall On Experience’

Robert Redford recently journeyed to Dublin, Ireland to receive an honorary degree from Trinity College.

The actor-director expressed doubts about Barack Obama and the Dems’ chances of winning in the fall.

“I’m not confident of anything,” Redford told the Irish Times. “I’m hopeful.”

Redford acknowledged Obama’s resume deficit.

“I think Obama is not tall on experience . . . but I believe he’s a really good person,” Redford said, adding that the Dem presumptive nominee is “smart. And he does represent what the country needs most now, which is change.”

Redford sees the election of Obama to the presidency as a must win for the Democrats, or it will mean the end of Hollywood’s favorite political party.

“I hope he’ll win. I think he will. If he doesn’t, you can kiss the Democratic Party goodbye . . .,” Redford lamented.

According to the Sundance Kid, it’s all about “new blood.”

“I think we need new voices, new blood. We need to get a whole group out, get a new group in,” Redford said.

Michael Moore’s Hometown Cracks Down on Saggy Pants

Tabloid Extravaganza: A-Rod, C-Rod, Madge and Lenny

One bit of celebrity melodrama has virtually taken over the print, broadcast and Web media.

It’s simultaneously being reported as a news, entertainment and sports story and is crowding out coverage of the war, election and economy.

It involves baseball star Alex Rodriguez, a.k.a. A-Rod, Rodriguez’s wife, a.k.a. C-Rod, material girl Madonna, a.k.a Madge in the U.K., Madonna’s husband Guy Ritchie and rocker Lenny Kravitz.

Here’s the skinny: C-Rod found out A-Rod was involved with Madge, who was supposedly divorcing husband Ritchie. C-Rod fled to Paris to stay with Kravitz and reportedly blames Madge’s Kabbalah religion for luring husband A-Rod to her side. According to the New York Daily News’ sources, C-Rod found a note written to Madge from A-Rod that read: “You are my true soulmate.”

All of the parties involved are denying the romantic aspects of the reports.

The really amazing story, however, is the way the press has been going full court tabloid over the tale.

Here are a few of the headlines:

– “Lenny Kravitz: Cynthia Rodriguez’s Grand Slam?” (New York Magazine)

– “New adventures of old Madonna (co-starring A-Rod)” (The Boston Herald)

– “A-Rod and wife heading into foul territory” (The Miami Herald)

– “Wife: Madonna lured A-Rod with kabbalah” (United Press International)

– “Let’s play six degrees of Madonna” (The San Jose Mercury News)

– “Madonna and A-Rod and Lenny? (Oh My).” (Gary Post Tribune)

It’s enough to make you long for good old hard news.

James Hirsen is a media analyst, Trinity Law School professor, and teacher of mass media and entertainment law at Biola University.

Seinfeld Lawsuit “Vegetable Plagiarism?”

Michael Moore’s ‘Hometown’ Cracks Down on Saggy Pants

Although filmmaker Michael Moore was born in Davison, Michigan, an upper-class suburb 10 miles away from Flint, Moore claims Flint as his hometown.

Michael best beware the next time he steps foot in Flint because local cops are patrolling to see whose pants need raising.

Flint police chief David Dicks released a statement announcing the city’s new campaign against saggy pants, meaning trousers that have that nasty habit of slipping below the waistline.

Anyone who wears either pants or shorts that are on the descent will be arrested and charged with a misdemeanor, which could get the person 93 days to a year in the slammer and/or a $500 fine.

Dicks explains that those who expose their underwear and claim that it is a form of self-expression are no longer practicing free speech.

Not even in a big old orange jumpsuit.

James Hirsen is a media analyst, Trinity Law School professor, and teacher of mass media and entertainment law at Biola University.

Dr. Phil Scolded by George Michael

In front of a star-studded audience, Dr. Phil McGraw was recently taken to task by of all people George Michael.

While at a Los Angeles concert performance by Michael, Dr. Phil was chewed out over his non-sunny expression.

“I probably shouldn’t say this but it’s very me,” Michael announced from onstage.

“Dr. Phil is here, and in the sea of faces he has this miserable look – he’s been doing it for the last hour,” the singer added. “I probably shouldn’t say this, but maybe you need to see someone about that.”

Some of the concert attendees started booing the daytime TV advisor.

Celebs in the audience who may or may not have booed included Bo Derek, Pink, Sharon Stone, Randy Jackson, Cyndi Lauper and Kathy Griffin.

Guess this means all Michael concertgoers have to don happy faces or risk being singled out as sour pusses.

X Files’ Rapper-Actor Xzibit a Non-Believer in Aliens

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In the upcoming movie, “The X Files: I Want to Believe,” which is set for release in late July, a rapper with the perfect name to act in an “X-Files” flick, Xzibit, does a decent job playing an FBI agent

Xzibit, a.k.a. Alvin Nathaniel Joiner, is also known for hosting the MTV reality show “Pimp My Ride.”

When asked about his personal beliefs with respect to the existence of extra terrestrial life, Xzibit seems to have taken a cue from fellow rapper Kanye West.

“I don’t believe in aliens,” Joiner tells People magazine. “I don’t think aliens or ghosts like black people. We never get abducted; our houses never get haunted. It always happens in rural areas, where no ethnic people live. The day I see somebody from South Central Los Angeles say, ‘Man, I got abducted yesterday,’ then I’ll believe it.”

Xzibit might want to check out one of the most famous alien abductions from the 1960s; that of Barney Hill, along with his wife Betty.

Barney was an African-American that aliens apparently liked enough to have a close encounter with.

James Hirsen is a media analyst, Trinity Law School professor, and teacher of mass media and entertainment law at Biola University.

The Scarlett Johansson-Barack Obama Connection

Presumptive Democrat nominee Barack Obama is often compared to John F. Kennedy.

But one thing JFK didn’t have to contend with was email.

Scarlett Johansson’s recent revelation that Obama is her regular email pal is creating quite a stir.

The actress apparently gives the presidential candidate advice via email missives and comforts him when he’s had a tough day in the same e-way.

“You’d imagine that someone like the senator who is constantly travelling and constantly ‘on’ - how can he return these personal emails?” Johansson tells the Politico. “But he does, and in his off-time I know he also calls people who have donated the minimum to thank them.”

She also says that after a difficult debate he had, she sent Obama an email patting him on the back for “holding his ground.”

The Dem candidate emailed the actress that the questioning at the debate was “difficult” and that he was given “one silly question after another.”

Johansson says she’s not only supporting someone but is “having a personal dialog with them, and it’s amazing.”

Obama is a fan of the actress’ films, his fave being “Lost in Translation.”

He’s also a “huge movie lover” who “knows who every actor is,” Johansson says.

In the past, she joked that she was “engaged” to the Illinois Senator, quipping, “My heart belongs to Barack.”

She was also featured in his celebrity filled Internet clip, “Yes We Can,” and may be one of the reasons the clip drew more than 13 million viewers.

Johansson is ready to “do cold calls, public service announcements, all different things to help out.” She’s willing to be “part of a benefit concert or show, and then perhaps hosting after-parties or dinners beforehand,” too.

Reactions and questions are surfacing, though.

“Perhaps it’s true, power makes men stupid. Why in the world is Barack Obama emailing Scarlett Johansson?” Reny Monk at the Huffington Post asks.

“So you’ve got a 23-year-old gorgeous, blonde actress e-mailing a married presidential candidate. Well, what could go wrong there, huh?” Jay Leno inquires tongue-in-cheek.

James Hirsen is a media analyst, Trinity Law School professor and teacher of mass media law at Biola University.

Barack Obama’s Tinseltown Trip

Come late June, Barack Obama will be traveling to Tinseltown.

This time he’ll arrive as the presumptive Democrat nominee.

Now that the primary is over, Hillary’s Hollywood contingent is expected to open up its coffers for Obama.

A fundraiser is set to be held at the Los Angeles Music Center, with invites going out to the wealthiest Dem donors in So Cal.

In all probability, the H-bash will add megabucks to Obama’s already sizable war chest.

During the 2004 presidential campaign season, dreary John Kerry was able to raise $5 mill at a celebrity-laden event, which was held at one LA Music Center venue, the Walt Disney Concert Hall.

Although John McCain has more buddies in Hollywood than any Republican since Ronald Reagan, any attempts to match or even come close to what Obama will tap from Tinseltown are likely to fail miserably.

As Chad Griffen, veteran political advisor to Rob Reiner, told the Los Angeles Times, “I can’t imagine anyone in the entertainment industry going from Hillary Clinton to John McCain.”

Some Operation Chaos devotees might beg to differ.